Sir, you are making me nervous

Was a good, borderline great class last night. Not so much in the whole of what we did but just how it's going.

Warmups then worked on kicks and I felt good with them. My sidekicks, while not super high, are coming into form more and more, as do my back kicks.

We then worked a bit on a simple strike/block drill. Nothing super special, two by two, one attacking the other with various strikes and you just had to block the first strike and counter with one punch, just that, one punch. The rapid sequence at which we went was great to help me see and decipher what's coming and simply get out of the fire.

We then kept on working by doing the strike/block sequence but also adding one lock to end the attack. I'm feeling better and better with how how I can see the attackers hand once I've blocked the first strike and get back to it to grab and lock it. Still much work is needed.

We then were sent to practice on our own with my group of three higher brown belts to work on Cat 3. I was the only one who knew it all so I kind of led the way and helped the other two in filling in some blanks they had with it. I'm feeling better and better with that kata. I remember when I presented it in competition and even a bit afterward, I kept having to think a whole lot during it. Now, it's coming a bit more naturally. Still need to work on the back kicks, gotta stop losing my balance, but it's much better now than it was only a couple months ago. Our instructor had us present it to him just as class was ending. I punched with the wrong hand and one point in the kata but otherwise, I felt it went pretty well and that was also his comment about it. He told me that technically, my interpretation of the kata is sound and sincere although I still look like I'm thinking during a couple of tiny sequences. He really liked my double kick that happens toward the end. He always likes to put the emphasis on the fact that the double kick should be linear, more horizontal than vertical and he told me he thought I nailed that aspect of it during my kata last night. That was a huge ego booster.

Class was done just after my kata so we kneeled down and meditated and he talked to us a bit. He went on talking generally to "those of you getting close to the black belt" all the while looking in my direction. Sure there was another 2nd kyu next to me, but I felt like he was looking at me. ME??? Hold on there mister, I'm in no way, shape or form getting close to a black belt. Sure, closer today than I was yesterday, but never close enough.

On the other hand, will I ever be close enough, at least by my own standards? Probably not. And then, maybe he didn't mean anything more than "keep working on it, someday it'll be your turn". That's what I intend to do, keep on practicing for the fun of it...

FM